Comparison-itis Can Hit Hard… You’re Not Alone
The other day, I was sitting in my car stopped at some train tracks. My 2 beautiful daughters were in the car with me. One was looking at a Christmas toy catalog and the other one was – shockingly – on her phone 😉
As I waited for the commuters to disembark off the train, my mind started wandering and I seriously started worrying in a big way, which is unusual for me. I’m a pretty good “Trust the process” kinda CEO! But that day, I’m pretty sure my daughters could taste the stress pouring off of me!
All of the sudden I noticed a bunch of movement out of the corner of my eye.
Next to me, also waiting for the train to pass and the gates to raise up, was a fabulously beat up old Honda with two 20-something girls in it. The movement that caught my eye was the two of them just plain rocking out. Hair flying, singing along, car shaking kind of rocking out!
I became acutely aware of my stressed out, midlife mom life that was going on in my car. I wanted to be in THAT FUN car. The Young Adult CarefreeMobile!
Does’t it feel that way in business sometimes though? Like you’re sitting in your Coach Mobile, worried and uptight and unable to move forward because of fear or overwhelm or whatever…
and in the Coach Mobile next to you, it looks like they’re having a ton of fun? They’re carefree and easily creating clients and income? They’re posting on social media like they’re a source of continuously flowing content that never ends? And get massive engagement?
And you’re living the stressed out midlife mom-mobile life?
UGH. Comparison-itis just STINKS.
No matter WHERE you are in your business… (and right now, I’m running the business I dreamed of 5 years ago…), that feeling of “Someone else is doing this better” can creep right in.
Here’s a Few Simple Steps for Banishing Comparison-itis, and Getting Back To What You Love:
So what do you do when the Biz Mobile next door has better branding, messaging, income, clients, engagement, and All The Thing You Want?
1) Get out of ISOLATION – IT’S BAD. Business has pros and cons. The pro? You work for yourself. The con? You’re working for yourself. Get into a community or mastermind or FB group of coaches who are experiencing similar journeys. (Hint: I love mine! Join us and bring your comparison-itis. No judgement here!)
Getting out of isolation is the #1 thing you can do. Get with other coaches, admit the vulnerability, and
2) Figure out which of your BUSINESS VALUES is being challenged or ignored. For example, I have a HUGE value on FUN, personally AND professionally. Seeing those girls in the car next door made me feel like crap about myself, because we weren’t really having any fun in my car. Opposite, in fact. The fix is usually so easy. For me, it was turn on a kids sing along station. For my business, it was to spend some time doing what I LOVE and getting on FB lives, writing, and learning – the things that are FUN to me.
3) This is a triggering one, are you ready? REACH OUT to the business that triggered your comparison-itis and get into student mode. Do they have copy you love? Ask for their copywriter. Do they have branding you love? Ask how they did it. Seeing something we LOVE can be a great opportunity to get closer to it!
4) SHUT OUT THE NOISE. I’ve had to unsubscribe from business owners I LOVE because I needed to just plain stop triggering myself. I had to take myself out of the line of trigger fire until I was stronger. It’s OK to block, hide, unsubscribe, take a different route… you don’t HAVE to face your triggers!
I hope this gives you a few strategies to handle the very natural comparison-itis that comes along with running a business.
We CARE about what we’re doing… we’re coaches! It’s so natural that our hearts are on our sleeves.
I want to tell you that YOUR gift and YOUR energy is needed, even if you feel someone else is doing it better… NO ONE can do YOU any better than you can.
Peace, purpose, and play,
PS: I drive a really fun 6-speed hatchback with a little turbo engine 😉 I’m fun! I swear.
PPS: We’d LOVE to see you in The Coach’s Playground FB Mastermind. Later today I’m going LIVE like I do every week to give YOU specific guidance, coaching, and mentorship… so hop in! Don’t go it alone. It’s free, we’re here for you, and we have FUN.